NEW MONOPOLIES
I never thought I’d say it, but I’m starting to miss the cable companies.
Whipping boys don’t grow on trees, you know.
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OPEN MIKE NIGHT AT TOWN MEETING
Q. What did the Canada goose say at Town Meeting?
A. I just flew in from the Common, and are my wings tired!
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Tags: Bill Carroll, Bob McLaughlin, comedians, comedy, Daily Item, funny, Humor, Open Mike, Town Meeting, Wakefield, Wakefield Daily Item, Wakefield Item, Wakefield MA, Wakefield Massachusetts, William H. Carroll
SUPPORTING THE TROOPS?
As we approach another Memorial Day with our country at war, it will be interesting to watch the attendance at events around the country. We often hear from those in the anti-war ranks that they oppose the war but “support the troops.” And yet, when I attended last November’s Veterans’ Day observance in my hometown of Wakefield, Massachusetts, the level of support that I saw for our troops and for our veterans in general was disappointing at best.
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GRADUATION SPEECH, 2006
Well, that time of year is once more upon us, and again my commencement day speech has been written, re-written, polished and rehearsed. I am, in short, prepared to impart the following pearls of wisdom to any class of graduates at any school that will have me.
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WAS JANEANE GAROFALO HERE?
Wakefield Tonight, 20 Years Later
I know what got me thinking about “Wakefield Tonight,” the weekly live cable TV comedy/variety show that I produced on Wakefield Public Access Television twenty years ago, from late 1985 through the end of 1986.
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Tags: 1980s, Bill Downes, Bob Seibel, Boston, Carl Yarde, Chance Langton, Charlie Brooks, comedy, comedy club, comedy clubs, Denis Leary, Elaine Gold, Fran Solomita, Gary Stewart, Janeane Gaofalo, Jimmy Tingle, Jon Rubin, Kevin Meaney, Lenny Clarke, Linda Franklin, Paul Lazarus, Paula Poundstone, public access television, Rich Ceisler, stand-up, standup, Steve Faria, Steven Wright, Stu Wiley, Tony Morewood, Tony V, Wakefield Public Access, Wakefield Tonight, Warner Cable, Warner Cable Communications Inc, Warner-Amex, WCAT
CAT TRAINING
It is generally believed that dogs are easier to train than cats. That’s probably true if you are looking for a pet to fetch the newspaper or sit up and beg. For complex reasons of evolution and breeding, dogs are by nature more eager to please than cats are.
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Filed under: Cats, Columns & Essays, Humor | 1 Comment
BRIGHT LIGHTS, BIG VEHICLES
Like cell phone users who won’t shut up and drive, people who cruise around with their headlights permanently set in the “blind” position are a menace and a danger on the roadway. I used to think that the problem was just people who left their high beams on by mistake, but I now realize that there is more to this than meets the eye.
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THE COLDEST SUMMER
Sure, it’s been cool so far this summer. The average daily high temperature for July has been 77.6, almost 4 degrees below the normal average high of 81.4. The average mean temperature for the Boston area has been 3 degrees below normal.
You think that’s bad? Try the New England summer of 1816. That’s the year known as “The Year There Was No Summer.” Snow fell in Massachusetts on June 7. People referred to 1816 as “Eighteen Hundred and Froze to Death.”
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COMMENCEMENT DAY ADDRESS
Most schools have already secured their commencement day speakers, and again this year, my phone hasn’t rung. But if the featured graduation day speaker for your college, high school, middle school or driving academy should happen to cancel, I am ready to fill in at a moment’s notice. To prove that I’m fully prepared to step into the breach, I have already written my commencement address, which follows.
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Mark Sardella 