Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

Let me be the first to wish you and yours a happy Columbus Day. This year’s holiday is doubly special because it’s not just the second Monday in October. Monday also happens to be Oct. 12, which is traditional Columbus Day. It will be exactly 528 years ago to the day that the great Italian […]


Mailing it in

25Sep20

It’s adorable how people still refer to Nov. 3 as “Election Day.” We’ve had “early voting” for a couple of years, which began the process of diluting the meaning of Election Day. Now, with the totally unnecessary concept of “mail-in voting,” we’re told that we may not even know the result of the presidential election […]


Monday is Labor Day, meaning that the Summer of 2020 will finally, mercifully, be over. So long, COVID Summer. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out. It was the summer of face coverings, cancellations and quarantines, as opposed to concerts, camp and cookouts. Everything was canceled, including local favorites like the Fourth […]


It’s taken far too long, but I now see the light. Change is needed. Now. In the words of the old hymn, “I once was lost, but now am found / Was blind but now I see.” Like many, I’ve resisted change. Change is hard. It forces you to think.


Big bang theory

11Jul20

When is a firecracker just a firecracker? If you were in Wakefield — or anywhere else in the country — on July 4 weekend, you probably noticed a dramatic uptick in the volume of amateur fireworks compared to other years. You were not alone. “Fireworks complaint” was far and away the dominant entry in the […]


Who knew that rioters and looters were covered under Phase 1 of the re-opening plan? High school graduation ceremonies with 260 students are still verboten, but if you and several thousand of your comrades want to get together and torch a church or flip over a few police cruisers, no one’s going to stop you […]


Cruel choices

30Apr20

The choice, apparently, is a binary one. You can have economic devastation or death. You can have your livelihood or your life. There are no other options, so take your pick. That’s the way it’s being framed by amateur epidemiologists on social media, who can always find some “study” on the internet to justify expanding […]


Walk this way

02Apr20

As we plunge headlong toward the apocalypse, I’ve had lots of time to reflect. One thing I’ve been thinking about is rules and regulations, and lately, I’ve had no shortage of new ones to ponder. One silver lining is the governor’s new ban on reusable cloth shopping bags. As it turns out, those of us […]


Out of an abundance of misanthropy, I have decided to self-quarantine until further notice. No, I’m not reacting to the coronavirus. I’m responding to the sheer panic that has overtaken the human population in the last week, including some normally level-headed leaders. I’m in Stop & Shop about every other day under normal circumstances. But […]


A rank choice

20Feb20

What do you call an electoral system where if your candidate loses, you get to vote again? Some people call it “ranked-choice voting.” I call it “legalized voter fraud.” If a measure on the November ballot in Massachusetts passes, you can say goodbye to such quaint concepts as “one person, one vote” and “the candidate […]